i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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