Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize