this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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