Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

rhymes with "ouble enetration"

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(501): View more from Arkansas

I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay

(602): View more from Arizona

I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"

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(989): View more from Michigan

News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.

(1-989): View more from Michigan

Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.

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(410): View more from Maryland

no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina

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(952): View more from Minnesota

we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)

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(970): View more from Colorado

I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.

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(703): View more from Virginia

i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.

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