Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
