Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
the condom got lost in my hair
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Randomize
