it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
