Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
People in love make me want to vomit
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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