i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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