I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
