It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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