Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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