So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
