just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
