i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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