Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
