I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
