dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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