you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
i think we sleep fucked last night...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
