There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
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