I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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