she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize