i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
