nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
People with herpes should wear stickers.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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