you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
It was confusing and full of hummus
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
