Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize