He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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