I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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