You can't motorboat a personality
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
