So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
