i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
