Say something about gay babies.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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