Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
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