if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
