So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
