There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
