it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize