I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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