You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
