how can u be prego again
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
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