Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
