Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
