Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
