I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
