There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize