ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
