eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
