what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
