I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
