he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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