im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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